Hi Mommies,
Here I am going to share with you my struggle with my baby boy. My first kid is a boy. He is now 6 and a half yrs. As a new mom, almost everything was challenging. It is challenging even now with him. Here, you are going to understand a mom who yearned for her sons’ love.
I started working after my baby was 1 and a half. My parents needed my support. They still need it. So, unwillingly, I had to leave my baby home and go for a job. No doubt, my parents and my in-laws took care of my son well. But, I never got that treatment from him, where, the child comes running towards the mother when she enters the house from the work, Hugs her, Kisses her, Asks her why you are late, Tells her how much did he miss her. Never, nothing sort of that happened between my son and me.
I used to feel as if this is a punishment that I am going through, maybe. I was working in corporate as a spoken English, personality development, and a German trainer. I switched myself to a school post having a kid to take care of my kid and parents. I worked with the schools for 3 yrs.
Now there is a twist in the tale. I got pregnant with my second one. I went for a maternity break. School relieved me 4 months before the delivery. I was baffled, thinking, How am I going to manage my Finances? What will I do sitting at home? I want to take care of my little one too. I didn’t want to join early and leave the baby unfed.
So, I took a 1 and a half yrs break for both the kids to feed them properly and then go to work, no sacrifice leaving the kids to suffer. My son grew as a kid who will watch TV right from the time he will get up from bed. My husband and in-laws used to allow him, Not complaining; my in-laws are too sweet. Only, they used to give him a lot of freedom.
On the other side, I was like, yes; you may watch tv but not as soon as you get up from bed. My son used to cry when he used to see me on Sundays. He used to say, ”WHY ARE YOU AT HOME? GO TO SCHOOL. I DONT WANT YOU TO BE AT HOME.” Imagine how a mother would have felt? ”Shattered.” My kid doesn’t want me nearby.
It’s me who used to take him for studies. Even now, That is not allowed to anyone, Not even my husband. My son needs a strict person, and that’s me. I can’t leave him with anyone and then cry at my old age that I didn’t take care of my son. NO WAYS. I used to do all possible things with him.
But, that love which I should get from him was always found empty. After the second baby, My son wanted a brother, and we got an angel, a cutie pie, a doll baby. We were so scared as to how will he react to this. But, to my astonishment, He loved his sisy so much.
We never used to greet God Bless to the second one when he was near, thinking he would feel jealous. But, within 3 days, he found out that we were not greeting her. He said, ”Why are you not telling her GOD BLESS YOU when she sneezes? She, too, is our baby; we shouldn’t be discriminating; that is not good. How will she feel if she gets to know this? She will say, my parents, love bhaiya more and not me’; I don’t mind if you say that, pls do all those things, which you did for me.”
That was a great sigh of relief.
I took a break from my teaching in schools for some time, so I didn’t get a job later. And the pandemic added on. Hence, I started a fine art of mine, DHANA FINE ARTS OF VOCAL VIOLIN DANCE NARAYANEEYAM BHAGWAT GEETA Classes online and offline. A lot of change could be seen in my son this year when I am at home.
He got used to me. He minimized watching TV; he started asking for permission. He hugs me too often. He shares all that happened at the park. And when I was not there with him, I now understood he wanted me so badly. As I was not there to wake him up, the child must have been angry. Maybe, this was the way to show that he wanted me. Maybe. Maybe yes, His eyes would have searched for me for 8 hours. That’s a long wait. I am a momenterprenuer. I work, I earn, And I will also be with kids when they need me.
The Moral of My Story Is:
Children spell love as time, ”Quality time.” My son has been a teacher to me since he was in the womb. I am learning a lot of things from an ingrown man and a lovely brother.
I also want to give every mom advice; If you have sufficient money, better stay home. Look for something where you can also earn along with taking care of kids. We ruin their future in search of a wonderful present. Kids are gifts from God. As Lord Krishna couldn’t be everywhere, He gave us kids. Enjoy with them. That money is of no use which could not buy love from your kids.
Stay Home Stay Safe. ”Happy motherhood.”
