Varsha, The Miracle Born To Me!!
I cannot handle this anymore,” I cried and howled. Sriram (my husband) came to me and hugged me, “don’t worry dear, we will find a way.” It was one of the bad days when my “periods” arrived.
“I want baby, my own blood and soul, “I cried and shouted. My inlaws and husband tried to control me.
I have been married for 8 years, and I am still waiting for a life born in my womb.
It all started after 2 years of completion of my marriage. Each and every month, I started believing that something positive will happen and I will have a baby. But days rolled by and then months and then years. Everything was happening, but I didn’t get my baby.
My sex life was screwed up. There was no intimacy. It became monotonous, and all I want was baby, and for that, we had undergone a ritual called “sex.”
Poor hubby was badly treated as I would plan this “ritual” 3 to 4 times a week. Every time if something were wrong, I would blame him. He would tolerate everything just to calm me down.
Once my gynac said, “you have to undergo some special treatment like IUI.”
See, you cannot just look at the busy road standing at one side, at some point of time you have to cross the road “she said
I was so much STRESSED of everything, SCANS, INJECTIONS, SO MANY CAPSULES, NUMEROUS VISIT TO THE HOSPITALS.
Finally, I had to undergo my first IUI. I was happy that it would turn out to be positive anyway. 28 days countdown started for us. I was waiting each day, a smile crossed my lips, thinking of the life that will bloom inside me.
28, 27, 26………5, 4, 3, 2 and 1 ..finally the date has come, but I didn’t get periods from the morning. I felt slightly excited, but it didn’t last long; before evening, my periods started. I was shaken; I couldn’t digest that even if you go through the ‘treatment’ procedure, you will still not get a positive result.
Time flew away; there was in the hospital waiting for my 6th time. My husband consoled me and tried to create positivity around me. But I was almost lifeless. I just wanted my present moment to ‘go’ away. As it was not so pleasant lying in the theatre and waiting for “sperm.”
Again my countdown began, and this was the last attempt. If this fails, I would have to go to the next IVF procedure, which means more stress, more fears, more money, and more utmost care.
I was feeling dizzy when thinking about all these.
“Why are you looking upset, Morning will change our life?” Sriram touched my shoulder. It was 2 a.m, and I was sitting on my bed. Few drops of tears escaped from my eyes.”We will win the battle, don’t worry,” Sriram soothed me. I looked into his eyes, “how long?” And I smiled wistfully.
Sun was shining brightly. I was trying to be calm. Last chance, I was waiting for my life to be changed by destiny.
I was vexed up with all these issues and didn’t want to think anything.
Hours passed away the day was coming to an end. The next day I woke up, and my heart skipped a beat; I felt warmth and cold at the same time. So will it be “positive”?.
It was 30 days, and I felt somewhat excited, but I didn’t want to feel happy due to the fear of being getting the “periods.”
Sitting in the washroom, I prayed like mad when the drop of urine fell into the pregnancy strip. My eyes were longing to see those 2 pink lines. Finally, I could see two pink lines. My happiness knew no bounds. I ran outside and hugged my husband. He didn’t understand at first, but then he hugged me back and smiled. He made me sit, and my heartbeat became faster.
“So the good news is on the way,” said my doctor with high excitement. “Congrats, you are pregnant.” I felt a lump in my throat. Ah! For how many years I have been waiting for this!
“Congratulations, it is a girl, baby !” Said the head nurse showing the so tiny pink color baby covered with a similar pink towel.
I was beamed to see such a beautiful baby. I have never met such a tiny baby with ever so tiny eyes like beads watching me! “Ah! Varsha, you are my life. You showered rain in my dry world,” I said, looking at her. As I touched her, my motherly feeling arose, and there was an adrenaline rush. Varsha, you are a miracle! I observed.